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And with tears in the design of sadness, I took my beautiful daughter with me to the skies and we headed towards north Texas. 

Having just held on tightly to two precious members of my family knowing that although 7 weeks flies until we meet again, that actual separation is very upsetting and hard to do. Separation we never want but may specifically need and whether short term or lengthy, once the transition or ‘changeover period’ from A to B has taken place, we are able to adjust, but not without personal change. Once that period of time has wound itself around our thinking – new growth – newfound respect which arises from deeply missing this specific love person but with that specific love now having nowhere to go physically – and a deeper love – are found wanting and on offer. This is what connects us deeply. 

I found a piece of much needed heaven on South Padre Island and as hard as it is leaving my precious and very much loved favourite third born son and the best husband in the world, my goal and tasks to complete before I return are firmly in my mental place and planned. This, this makes it easier to bear.  

Richard and I, 20 years ago, prepared ourselves for teenager separation from before any of our children were born. So important it is to ensure we do not enslave ourselves around them but rather, let them go, empower them to feel free and know the world is for exploration and experiences, bad and good. And without insulting their thinking or disrespecting their individual journey, a deeper and private knowing I have given them back to my God I know, truly helps me. And because I know Him, this awesome God of mine, I know all is well. This thinking allows me to hold onto but also to let go, my incredible son Luke Chandler, almost 17. I can let him go because I know it is his turn now, very much like my eldest and second born, who I can see are forging ahead with their chosen paths. 

Yes, I can do this because I know my God. And I know He holds us. Even when I know my husband and children are not sure He exists. I know my God. And I know He hears me and I know He blesses and protects these very ones I love. 

I know His Plans for each of us are to prosper. To give us a hope and a future. To bless us with an abundance of love and calm, peace and contentment. All along our individual paths and journey. 

And I know that as long as I use and spend time, minute by minute, trusting His Process, I am in fact, in this small way – going about my daily tasks and attempts at constant love – accomplishing His Will for our individual and family-unit lives. 

And so I am not afraid of or begrudge the shape of sadnesses, despite their tears. 

Precious, precious family of mine – until we meet again. X